You don’t know what you got… til it’s gone!

 

I gotta tell you, no disrespect to Cinderella but I wanted to post the Joan Jett version of this song but I couldn’t find a real video for it. As most of you know I am all about the female rock/punk gals but this will do, Cinderella got me through a lot of crazy times in my teens and I still dig em. Anyway on to this weeks wacky adventure…

When I got to Korea I knew only of the bathrooms of America. Overall they are clean and fine (lets not get into truck stop bathrooms… those don’t qualify as actual places that belong in this univers). What America lacks in toilet seat awesome it makes up with things like toilet paper and actual paper towels and soap.  Upon arriving I discovered REAL bathroom glory. I had heard about washlets and showerseats (the Japanese term for bidet toilet seats) from exchange students but I really had no basis for comparison. My school’s teacher bathroom has bidet seats in it (washlet and showerseat for those reading in Japan) it was there that I first realized the error of America’s ways. See, in America our bathrooms have cold hard plastic toilet seats… before coming to S. Korea I THOUGHT those were just fine. Boy was I wrong.

Upon coming to S. Korea I experienced the glory that is the washlet! I ran out and bought one for my apartment soon after I realized the error of my ways. For a few months life was good… my toilet seat was warm and comfortable. Hell, it even washed with warm water! I realize this is a less than comfortable subject to talk about so I am trying to describe everything gently. Lets just say toilet seats that are heated and wash and blow dry your bottom when you are finished with your business are the bee’s knees! So why would I be writing about this? Two days ago my paradise came crashing down!

I woke up and discovered that my washlet (bidet) wouldn’t turn on. No matter how many times I pushed the ON button it wouldn’t power up. Like a retarded chimp I looked at it with a puzzled look on my face and kept pushing the ON button to no avail. It mocked and laughed at me as it did nothing. I thought should I give it an offering or pray to it?  You could almost see a grown man cry. See, right now the temperature in S. Korea is plummeting and yours truly was loving the nice warm seat. How could my glorious seat betray me, now more than ever when my cold ass needed it?

I asked my co-teacher (handler) to call the store I bought it from. My only instruction to her… PLEASE HELP ME!!! Good news, there is a year warranty and the store would send someone out the next day! My heart soared with joy! The service man just left my apartment, everything is all better. All is right with the balance of the universe and my cold ass again. He replaced the power board and got it back running again. Lets just say I hope I don’t have to endure the hell that was the 2 days without my washlet again any time soon. I guess it is true, you really don’t know what you got til it’s gone! I am currently looking at how I can send home 2 of these modern marvels of technology to my house in America because come hell or high water I will NOT go through that hell again.

trust me American, once you live in a world of heated seats and bidet glory there really is not other world. don’t judge me monkey… just trust me.

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